I just wanted to blog about Paul and Heather. No one really cares, but then again, not many read this blog.
Ever since Macca split from Eileen (get it? BAD joke), people have been criticizing his decision to waive the prenup. Americans are ones to sign this "bet we get divorced" document. The British think it is "dirty." Why would he even think of it? He probably thought marriage to Heather would be just as happy as with Linda. (well, maybe not AS happy.) They just didn't seem to match as well. Heather seems to want the lime light. She wasn't a name before Paul and now she accuses the marriage for overshadowing who she is. Wha?? She talked him into plastic surgery, changing his wardrobe and dying his hair. You KNOW Linda would've hated that!! The man basically had a grey mullet during his last tour and the world didn't care! Interesting that she got married, had baby Beatrice and now has a guaranteed "ticket to ride." Now Paul's alone again. I'm not sure he's miserable. Who knows. He's dealt with a greater loss. So has the world.
I just finished watching Wingspan, the documentary about Wings. It begins with the history of Paul and Linda's relationship. I've always admired their marriage and since about 13, dreamed that my marriage would be the same way. I love it that she wasn't a goddess. She was rather plain. Her body changed when she had children and it stayed that way. He loved her as a woman, a mother and his "girlfriend."
I find myself obsessing over the McCartney marriage. It's odd to think about marriage now. Before, it was just something that seemed so far out...something that might not even happen. It seems closer now. Attainable. I always felt that it was a jail cell. That's awful. Every time one of my friends got engaged, I felt like they died. I cried and cried. Even recently when Amanda got engaged. With Bryan, it was a shock...not that he did it, but that suddenly a relationship would be over. You don't really have good friendships with married men.
I feel like I could have men friends just the same. I know that my husband would be able to have friendships with women. I'm not put off by it. I'm trusted, so he should be too. I'm excited about the team aspect. I'm excited about being a part of something...a family. I loved the way the Maccas lived. They went everywhere together..kids in tow. They lived off of the earth and they traveled everywhere--just to go. They were friends. I'm excited about that, too. I love being trusted to be who I am. I used to feel that I'd have to change to be a "good" wife. I'm not so much in the kitchen. I know I can learn! Thing is, I'm not expected to. I'm good with conversation, with keeping communication open, trying new things, seeing new places, being open to new ideas and learning as much as I can about how to get through life in one piece. I want to be happy. I'm excited for the experience of learning with someone. I'm not a finished being...I'm a work in progress and I've come to accept that I take longer than others to figure some things out. I always thought I had to be some sort of 4-H mom or June Cleaver wife. I'm a mess though. I don't go to church...I'm still learning. I can't cook, I don't grocery shop, I clean when I have the time, I don't know how to sew (I could probably figure out a button) and I'm really not that organized. However, I can talk to anyone about anything, I can sit an be quiet with you, I hold hands, hug and kiss more than anyone needs it. I'll drive wherever to be with you. I can read a recipe. I can read you a book. I love children and plan on raising as many as I can. The Maccas have 4 bright and accomplished children. I can't wait for babies!! My clock is ticking. I love being able to say that without a look of fear staring back at me. At the moment, I can be what I am...and what I'm not. I can say what's on my mind about anything from what I hate about a movie to what I want my child's name to be and I'm not afraid. I'm a part of something that makes sense.
The Maccas were simply two people that preferred to spend their time together rather than with anyone else. She wasn't a musician, nor could she sing. She was in Wings because they wanted to experience it all together. They loved the music and they just wanted to have a good time with it. With four kids, they had fun, they joked, they got through rough times and they grew together. Neither of them were perfect. Linda admits she wasn't a good student...Paul says that he was drawn to her kindness and her adventuresome spirit. They wanted to move to Scotland, so they did. They lived with nothing...and everything. If they wanted to see a new place, they just went.
I'm ready to move and start and stop and stay and go and stall...I'm ready to set fire to all of the ideas of marriage I grew up with and make it my own. I can't wait to be with someone who is just as ready to see everything on earth as I am--kids in tow...
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