Restless in Rochester

It's been a month. A few days more actually--since we arrived. Jason is gone this week to Palm Springs for a conference. He reports it's beautiful there...mid 80s. It snowed here today. Big flakes. It didn't snow enough to blanket the ground and make it that awesome quiet outside...you know? Snowy quiet. I love that noise. I'm looking forward to seeing how Rochester celebrates the season. Halloween had skeletons sitting on bushes and big balloon spiders (which scared me) laying on lawns.

We're still adjusting. I'm not too lonely yet. Friends call me constantly and I joined Face Book...which I tried desperately to avoid. (Actually, it isn't bad!) I found myspace to be a bit scary though. It's nice to get back in touch with old friends. I found most of the girls I hung out with in my frosh dorm in college. It's causing a lot of memories to flood over me. I'm so happy to be older. My 30s have been much kinder than my 20s. I definitely have better hair!

I'm going to do my best to start writing again. I've been reading over my old stories in college...wondering where the writer went. Fearing my internal critic has kept me blocked. Fear is a big component in my life still. My fear of flying seems to have come back. It was gone for years and then suddenly this summer, I panicked on a plane. Ever since, even the thought of flying makes me light headed. Two nights ago I read an interview in Vogue with Angelina Jolie. She is my age. I should focus on that, but I do. She became a pilot and flies her own plane. She seems fearless! It's true...I don't fear flying, I fear, fear itself. I'm made a prisoner by my own anxiety. That's no way to live! I'm putting together an illustrated auto biography--things you can do when you're unemployed with no kids!!--and I'm going to cut out a picture of Angelina to remind me to be fearless!

Movie Notes: (random)
Loved Rachel Getting Married- saw it at Little Theatre in downtown Roc. Reminded me so much of Liberty Hall in Lawrence. It smelled the same. I'll be surprised if Ann doesn't get a nomination. I also went to see Changeling. Hmmm...very disturbing. I thought Ang was good, but she's been better. It was hard to watch. I wasn't expecting the violence...I'm fine with violence, just not dealing with children. I'm really wanting to see Happy Go Lucky. I'll report my findings...

more tomorrow.