1096 days later...

Today is J and my 3 year anniversary. It seems longer, but not in a bad way. I feel that I've known him all my life. He certainly seems to know me that well. I guess I've known him since 2002. That's 8 years. We had our own lives for a long time. Our "story" is one that is either received with a raised eyebrow or with total acceptance. His roommate, which is how I met him, was my boyfriend for 3 years. T is a nice person, it makes sense that his roommate would be a good person as well. 3 years. (I usually get, "WOW, 3 years! That's quite a long time.!") It was a growing time for me unfortunately. T didn't get the "balanced" Valerie, but he loved me through my ups and downs and there is much to say for that. I believe we meet people during time in our lives that are there to help us through. I fear it was one sided, but hopefully he has some fond memories to look back on.

Jason was the roommate that was always in and out. He kept odd hours and didn't sleep much. He was very kind and a bit awkward but we seemed to have music and movies in common which helped with small talk. For years, we were just acquaintances really. I'd say friends, but that really didn't happen until later on.

After T and I ended--a very long, painful and drawn out process--ugh...Jason and I became roommates. (there is a long story that should be inserted here as to how and why I needed a roommate and how it became him, but I'm trying to make this brief.) I needed a place to stay and he was not really using his place. We both talked it over with T first, who was fine with it. (of course, I don't think he thought we'd get married eventually.) When I moved in, Jason was suppose to be in Alabama for long periods of time. (I'd been getting his mail for him when I spotted the extra room that looked perfect for me.) However, his project ended and he was suddenly around. He was single, I was single--but the T factor was an issue for a while. After weeks of becoming closer friends...talking, laughing and realizing how much we had in common...the spark ignited. We sparked for about 7 months before the L word came into the mix. After that...the rest is history.

We got married on a ship without our families or friends. We seem to always create just enough space for the two of us to grow. We love having people come see us and to spend time with others, but for some reason, we're always out in the world roughing it alone. Now, Z is here...and our world seems complete. I'd say our friendship is the key to everything. Romance can be hard when people are working, tired, dealing with internal issues and just trying to keep up. But, we laugh every day and we love the little world we've created. Marriage is hard. It's just work. Sometimes, it's more work than I thought it would be, but as I talk to people...everyone says that's exactly how it is. At the end of the day, we love each other. He is my partner in this universe and we have this perfect little being that we are raising. Life is good.

Happy Anniversary Honey. Our grandparents, who were married 61 years, each had that 3rd year. There are so many experiences to be had. We are both forever changing and growing...it's cool to see and experience it all. Thank you for trying to make me laugh as much as possible.