homesick

Home is many things for me. Home is Jason and Zoë. It's Chicago--where I grew up. It's Lawrence, where I first ventured out. It's St. John...where I fell in love for the first time. It's people. It's my girlfriends...it's Jeremy, it's Dustin. It's country roads and farmland. It's the color blue. It's The Beatles or The Doors or Edie Brickell. It's the smell of cut grass. The sound of a basketball on concrete. It's my mother's hand...or my grandmother's laugh. I miss the feeling of being younger. I miss the feeling that the day was all mine. I miss being me in my little tiny town. I miss my house in SJ. It's all heartbreaking to me at times. To miss so many things--however, it also makes me feel incredibly rich. I have so much to be thankful for. I'm especially thankful for the town St. John, KS was when I grew up there. It's not the same and it makes me horribly sad for my nieces and nephew. They won't have the same experiences.

Be present in your life. Take mental pictures. Take in the smells and the sights of your life. When your older...you can feel the bittersweet yearning for all of it.