Mothers with multiple children are aliens to me.

The last 7-10 days have been the kind where I find strength in my grandparents. They were married for 61 years and I'm SURE there were hard times. My hard times aren't that hard...I know that. Z is teething and has been for almost a month it seems. Her sleeping habits are destroyed and now she ends up in bed with us each night. I don't sleep well when she's with us. Jason loves it. Sleep is my time away! He's been so busy with work and school, I think he's just happy to have her near him. Maybe if we both worked we'd see each other more. Maybe if he didn't have all the pressure on him. He's a workaholic...though he'd say he's just doing what has to be done. But, I've never known him to have normal sleeping hours...or working hours. Yes, it used to be worse, but I wasn't married to him then. Now, the going to bed alone each night is tiresome. He can't help it--though he's not the best with time management. So, I lay in bed and think...yes, there are times when your husband turns into your roommate and your family is focusing more on a schedule than on making each moment count. I'm sure grandma and grandpa went through times much worse than these and they were happy. This is what day to day marriage is about--getting through the tough times. We can do it. Day dreaming about our simpler times falling in love is probably not the answer right now. The fact that the cold won't go away is also playing into it. We need the sun...we need outdoor time...we need family hikes and swings at the park. I need Z to go back to being sweet and quiet. I have a feeling those days are over. She is a little girl now...and a very head strong one. I'm happy she's not a wilting flower...but it makes for long days and battle after battle.

How do people have multiple children??? One is hard. We want one more...but, wow. Let me get to Spring and think about it. Right now...I'm in awe of anyone with more than one that is still smiling. Am I awful at this?? When Jason is super busy, I focus on making sure the house is clean so that he can think...that we're fed...that his laundry is done and try to be as upbeat as possible. (I'm not able to keep this up most days.) Each person in a family seems to be to be at their max--how is that possible? My friends have up to 7 children...and I'm struggling with one? Hmmm...