I can see clearly, now...

I'm on a design kick. Here's what I think: when trying to find your place in this world, redecorate. It's focusing my attention on a project and making me feel as if I'm contributing. I realize that taking care of Z is the most important job, but I want to create a home as well. I found this awesome wallpaper for our bedroom. I drug J and Mom around with me as I looked at a couple wallpaper stores. We were going to go with paint, but I love the designs and artistic factor. I still remember the wallpaper in my grandfather's house. It can have lasting affects. Ok, I'm over thinking this, but again...it's a project.

Over the weekend I watched Shutter Island. We watched it twice actually. Mom and I watched in Friday night and all three of us again on Saturday night. If you see the movie, you'll realize the need to see it twice. I enjoyed it, but it then through Jason into the research of lobotomies. I watched a video on YouTube of one. Wow. It's a scary thing. An ice pick...really??!!! Mom and I watched One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest last night to finalize our Mental Health issues movie weekend. I'd seen it years ago, but as most things, I didn't understand it fully until now. I feel I need to rewatch many things. I was either too young or too full of medication to really tune in. I was medicated for about 10 years and it's amazing how much clearer the world is now that I'm now free of it. (I'm not saying medication is a bad thing...but the cocktail I was on was mind numbing--no one should be taking 8-10 pills a day for anxiety/depression.) My time in Chicago is basically a blur. It's sad...I could've REALLY enjoyed it. (Jason came at the end of my fog--I cleared up about 10 months into our dating.)

So yes, the mental health movie marathon may have hit a wee bit close to home. (WOW will you look at that alliteration?!!!) It's fascinating and horrific--the human mind. The mind altering drugs and therapies that can be applied to it is just unreal. Terrifying.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0aNILW6ILk

Feel free to watch and comment. Sorry, I couldn't get the link to work, you'll have to cut and paste.