S E X

The results of the first comprehensive sex study in 20 years came out today. This had me thinking a lot about sex. I was surprised at some of the finding and not so surprised about others. I will say here that with my husband, I've never faked an orgasm. Actually, I think I've only faked it one time in my life. I didn't have an orgasm during sex until well into my 20s. I think that's right. My first time was at 17 with my first love. I couldn't tell you if I had an orgasm or not, I don't think so. During that time, I don't think I cared. I was young. I had no idea what I was doing. I knew that I enjoyed it and that I was in love. I didn't feel as if I was neglected in any way. Sex to me has always been somewhat of a power play. Without it, I do feel powerless in a relationship. That's not healthy is it? I rely upon it and become insecure without it. Those are my issues. I'm sure I'm not the only one. It's interesting read sex practices of others. You can look deeper into this analysis at their website:

National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior

Here are some of their findings:

• There is enormous variability in the sexual repertoires of U.S. adults, with more than 40 combinations of sexual activity described at adults’ most recent sexual event.
• Many older adults continue to have active pleasurable sex lives, reporting a range of different behaviors and partner types, however adults over the age of 40 have the lowest rates of condom use. Although these individuals may not be as concerned about pregnancy, this suggests the need to enhance education efforts for older individuals regarding STI risks and prevention.
• About 85% of men report that their partner had an orgasm at the most recent sexual event; this compares to the 64% of women who report having had an orgasm at their most recent sexual event. (A difference that is too large to be accounted for by some of the men having had male partners at their most recent event.)
• Men are more likely to orgasm when sex includes vaginal intercourse; women are more likely to orgasm when they engage in a variety of sex acts and when oral sex or vaginal intercourse is included.
• While about 7% of adult women and 8% of men identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual, the proportion of individuals in the U.S. who have had same-gender sexual interactions at some point in their lives is higher.
• At any given point in time, most U.S. adolescents are not engaging in partnered sexual behavior. While 40% of 17 year-old males reported vaginal intercourse in the past year, only 27% reported the same in the past 90 days.
• Adults using a condom for intercourse were just as likely to rate the sexual extent positively in terms of arousal, pleasure and orgasm than when having intercourse without one.