Kathryn, Gloria, Patti and Me.

I've been listening to a few books. One is The Help by Kathryn Stockett. I admit I started after I watched the movie. It moved me so much that I felt there was much more to the book.  I watched the movie feeling physically ill and uncomfortable. I've seen many movies that deal with racial issues, however, I feel different things and see different things as I grow. It really got to me more than in the past. I've always felt strongly...but I think more about being a mother and raising a child in this world. Seeing such horrible ways people were/are treated made me nauseous. More than that, how others acted. So ignorant and ugly. There are so many injustices and I feel them more as a woman in my 30s than I did as a child. The world is still so horribly rich with injustice, ignorance and cruelty.

I'm also listening to Just Kids by Patti Smith. I am so intrigued so far. It's a way to live an alternate life that I've always wondered about. As a teen, I romanticized the 60s and the bohemian lifestyle. I loved the music, the poetry, the way people seemed so alive. Patti writes about her life as a young girl in NYC and the meeting of her dear friend, Robert Mapplethorpe. Hearing how they created a life for themselves and how they soaked themselves in art and music makes me feel lonely at times. Lonely, but inspired at the same time. I'm going to start writing down the names of the people that inspired them (some I've never heard of) and research them myself. I just feel like learning. I want to experience more.

I watched that HBO special about Gloria Steinem and want to read one of her books next. I learned so much from that special. Thins I should have already known probably. I had no idea that Ms. magazine was Gloria's mag. I had no idea that Ms. as a title came into effect after its circulation. Did you?? I'm ready to learn more about her. She's tough, yet very soft hearted. She's sensitive...and by my age, she had accomplished so much. So many women seem to really have been plugged into life and really gotten so much more than I ever did. Being on tons of anxiety and depression medication just clouded me. I wasn't plugged into the world...or myself. I escaped everything by being numb and asleep. It's sad to think about how ahead I could be now...and I'm just playing catch up.

It's time to start diving into works that others found in their youth. I missed so much. My friend Jeremy Dewey lead me to Just Kids...we're reading it together. He's already done, but I'm close behind. I'll have to let you know how our book talk goes.